Thursday, November 18, 2010

God to Dog and back again??

This was sent to me from a dear friend it tickled me hope it does the same for you.



Dear God:  Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed?   
 

Dear God:  Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?   
 
 
Dear God:  When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?   

 
Dear God:  Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around?  We do love a nice ride!  Would it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?   
 
Dear God:  If a Dog barks his  head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?   


 Dear God: We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?   
 
Dear God:  More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.   
 

Dear God:  Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?   
 
 
 Dear God:  Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good Dog. 
 
 1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.
 

 2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.  
 
 3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.   
 
 4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.  
 
 5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.  
 
 6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet. 
 
 7.  Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying 'hello'.  
 
 8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.  


 9.  I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after. 
 
 10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.  
 
 11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch. 
 
 12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise,  it's usually not a good thing.
 
 

P.S.   Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?